My Top 3 Highlights from 2013 - 'One offs' with a difference!

Well it's almost upon us - that ringing in of the New Year.  Away with the Old.  Hello to the New!

But before I step into 2014, I've looked back over the last twelve months and realised a few things happened in the life of Sincere Moments  - things that are unlikely to ever happen again!

So here are my Top 3 Highlights from this year, in no particular order - each one with its' own set of emotions and memories!

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Will you marry me?

 

 

Back in April, I was delighted to design and lead little Oscar's Naming Ceremony.  Pete and Heather are just wonderful parents, deeply devoted to each other and their son.

 

But little did we all know, that Pete had something more up his sleeve for the big day!

 

 

Before the ceremony started, Pete took me to one side and gently said that he had something that he just wanted to say at the end to everyone - and could I make time for that please.  Of course! - I envisaged he wanted some space to make his own personal thanks to his family and friends.

But here's the shock......because this is what he really wanted to do:

There wasn't a dry eye in the room........as Pete turned to Heather............and thanked her for everything that she brought into his life......and everything that she'd become to him.  He loved her..........and would she marry him?  Little Oscar had no idea of the enormity of what was happening around him!

Needless to say the answer was a resounding Yes!........and I'm looking forward to helping them both celebrate their marriage next year.

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Dragon's Den Entrepreneur picks Sincere Moments as one of his favourite small businesses

 

It was April again that brought good news!  The business found itself in the spotlight for some local and national media coverage.

 

Theo Paphitis, the former Dragon's Den entrepreneur................picked Sincere Moments as one of his top 6 favourite small businesses.  That meant immediate access to Theo's international business network, to his other winners in the UK, and to his growing #SBS (Small Business Sunday) business network.

 

In November, I travelled to Birmingham to spend the day with him and other entrepreneurs......to hear his views on business.................and to receive my award from him.

 



During his speech, he made one particular comment that hit home to me.........."If your business doesn't rock your boat.........then go and get a job!"

Being a Celebrant certainly rocks my boat!

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An intimate Renewal of Vows - for a most inspirational lady!

 

It was down in Somerset in June, where I was delighted to lead a Renewal of Vows ceremony for a truly inspirational woman.

 

Naomi Thomas is the founder of the charity The Wedding Wishing Well Foundation (www.weddingwishingwell.org.uk) - a charity that helps terminally ill people, to have the wedding of their dreams.  In 2010, Naomi found out that she had incurable breast cancer - news that simply wiped out all her future dreams.  

 

On 6th June 2012, she married Graham.  A year later, and they decided that they wanted to celebrate their first year of marriage together with a Vow Renewal ceremony.  In Naomi's own words.....'We don't know if we'll have a second wedding anniversary!'

 

Away from all the spotlight and the media, Naomi and her husband Graham together with their son Devon, renewed their vows in the fabulous St Audries Park Manor House.(http://www.countryhouseweddings.co.uk/st-audries-park)

 

 

 

(Photos courtesy of http://www.martingillman.co.uk)

 

It was probably one of the most intimate of ceremonies that I've ever designed and led.  No audience.  No spectators.  Just two people lucky and grateful to have their time together.

 

Naomi went on to win the Daily Mail's Inspirational Woman of the Year award, taking her to Downing Street to meet and be congratulated by Samantha Cameron.  She's a remarkable lady who's making such a huge difference out there.  It was a pleasure to meet her and I wish her much strength in the times ahead.

 

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So there we have it!  A year where I've met many wonderful people and been involved in many milestone occasions.

 

Every ceremony I take is as unique to me, as it is to the people involved.  No two ceremonies are ever the same - nor should they be!   I'm always humbled at the personal stories people share with me and how they allow me to turn them into amazing ceremonies.

 

To all those I've worked with over the year, you've all taught me something, you've all made a difference for me. 

 

Thank you for choosing Sincere Moments to be part of your celebration.

 

Happy New Year to you all.

 

XCarole.

 

 

Backs of Heads........Brick Walls........Daylight.....3 top tips for things to think about when you're booking your Wedding Ceremony venue!

When I'm delivering a wedding ceremony, I'm mindful from start to finish.......of bringing everyone's minds into what's going on.   Guests are not there to just watch you do something.............if it was that simple we'd just send them a You Tube link after the event!  Each of them are with you because you decided they should be there.........and each one of them needs to feel your emotion on the day.

Your guests and how they feel about the ceremony..........is just as important as the vows you make to each other......and how you yourselves feel afterwards.  What your guests say long after the celebration, will be a tribute to how you made them feel part of it!

I'm always thinking of the senses!.......hear, see, feel, smell and taste.  And as much as I write to hit all of those senses, the venue plays a big part.

So before you turn the key in your car to go off in search of the ideal venue, here are 3 top things to mull over.  They're  little things........but they'll make such a huge difference for you, your guests and how your ceremony's perceived!

• What's so good about looking at the back of your heads? 

Why do people think that guests just want to look at the back of your heads?  We want to see you smile, laugh and cry.......We want to feel what you're going through!  We want to see your lips move to the words you say!...........Make sure your venue can seat your guests so that they can see you............Try the 'horseshoe' style!...........But whatever seating arrangements you go for.........we want to be able to smile with you......we want to cry when you do! 

• Why do you want to look at a blank wall?

When you're taking your vows with the love of your life...........why do you want a wall staring you in the face?   Wouldn't you much rather look out to beautiful scenery, a bright blue sky.......frost covered fields.............or tumbling snow?  Our minds work differently when we can visualise ............when we can imagine.  Walls block out your thinking!........And yet I've seen so many licensed venues who position their couples facing walls.......it's just lazy and poor event management skills!

• Why are you in a room with no natural daylight?

I've seen this in Register Offices and licensed venues too!  Everyone is escorted into a room with closed walls and no natural daylight........The only thing that lets you know that there's an outside.....is the exit door!

Natural daylight provides energy, even if we can only see it.  It makes us breath differently.  It helps us to visualise.  If I was offered a room at a venue with no windows, I would turn that booking down.  I've done enough training functions in my time, to know just how exhausted and depleted people feel when they're 'boxed in' ......no matter how long or short the event is.  Your ceremony is only half an hour - you owe it to everyone to make it the best half hour that you can!

So if you're off to visit a venue for any kind of ceremony, try following these three top tips!  Baby Namings, Vow Renewals, Weddings and Funerals......are all about emotion.  And what triggers our emotional button is the senses..........let them see light!

Carole

Getting going on Vow Writing - It's all about thinking first!

So you've decided to Renew your Vows!

You know you have complete freedom to say whatever you want to say!

But guess what?..........you can't get going!

Writing those first few words is the hardest thing for anyone to do - especially when you've got a blank sheet of paper staring you in the face.

Can you remember what you said last time?  Do you want to say the same vows or rewrite them altogether?  You may even want to do a 'pick-n-mix' - and select a bit of the old and and a little of something new.

So here's my starter for ten to get you going......and it's not about writing......it's about thinking first!

• Work in the past, present and future.

Think about how you felt those many years ago and how you felt saying your vows then.  Is there any element that stands out for you that you want to bring forward, to make sure it continues.

Then be 'in the moment' and think about what you have today with the other person.  Things you'd like to thank them for........surprises and challenges along the way............where you've both got to in life.

Then step ahead into your future - whatever that might look like! What do you want to make sure happens for the two of you?   How does your wider social and family life look in the future for the two of you and what do you both need to get there? If it was the best relationship it could be.....what needs to happen to get you there?

• Get hold of some Post-it-Pads - this bit is all about feelings and gut instinct!

Write down on as many words as you can to describe how you feel about the other person - use one Post-it for each word.  When you think you've come to the end......stop......think.....and then just write one more down that comes to mind.

Now put them all in front of you and take out your top 5 that have greatest meaning for you - you will want to negotiate.....you will want to swap and change....but you begin to get a feel for what's important.  I often do this exercise with couples who are struggling to find the words to write their own vows - it's a simple exercise that just draws out feelings....and it's amazing how quickly the vows emerge after it!

• Think of a sandwich

When you put your Vows together, think of it as though you're making a sandwich.  A thin slice to start .....lots of filling......and a final slice to top it off.  The final vow you make should in some way bring all of the other vows together to give a clear, memorable ending.  It's the finale!

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So there you have it - 3 Top Tips to get you going on writing your Vows.  The golden rule is to do plenty of thinking and playing around first!  Often this feels the most unproductive part of writing......but it's what makes your ideas flow much easier.

 

Your vows are personal to you.  They're the main focus of the ceremony.........Enjoy creating and promising them - they deserve the air space after so much hard work and thought!

XCarole

"I've been to blessings before, but that was the most 'sincere' I've ever been to!"

At a recent Renewal of Vows ceremony, I was struck by these comments from a member of the audience. She had been to blessings before, but for her, the experience of the ceremony I conducted stood out above all others.

So what is it that makes for a good ceremony?

Here are my 5 top tips that should help you create a first class ceremony - whether that be for a wedding, baby naming, renewal of vows, funeral service or other life changing occasion. The added trick is to find yourself a first class celebrant to bring it all to fruition for you!

• Begin with the end in mind - Often I'll ask people how they want to feel when they leave the ceremony and how they want their audience to feel. I'll then work backwards to make sure we deliver on this expectation.

• Keep the spotlight on everyone - There may be a special person or couple around which the ceremony is written. But there are others in the room who are just as important and their expectations for the ceremony are just as significant. Don't forget your audience!

• It's not the length or size that matters - Don't worry about filling time. What's more important is the quality of what's said and how it's said, rather than the length of the ceremony itself. I've seen and witnessed ceremonies that have gone on too long and everyone moves into distraction mode!

• Be comfortable with silence and a pause - Just because we cannot hear anything happening does not mean that we are standing still. Silences are a powerful intervention for allowing others to meander with their thoughts, and letting their minds wander into wonderful memories that they will remember forever. And they will always link these memories to your ceremony!
  

• Go with the flow - All ceremonies have a strucutre - A start and an end! What's important on the day is that your celebrant is able to read the emotion in the room and work that into the ceremony. 'Going with the flow' is a skill that experienced facilitators draw upon to keep engagement and relevance. Never work with a celebrant who is so hung up on structure, that they lose the opportunity to capture those wonderful off-the-cuff moments!
  

If you have an important ceremony looming - then try using these 5 points as a check list.

They will be different to what you might have seen so far, but they are designed to make the most of a ceremony that doesn't getting a second chance on its showing. You and your audience deserve the best chance there is at getting it right first time.!